Here was a woman who lost her children (to what objective cult experts
call a cult) with the help of a judicial system so corrupted by hasidic
bloc votes (and, allegedly, hasidic bribes) that a fair resolution of
custody disputes involving Sqvere hasidim is almost impossible to
achieve.
Deb Tambor, a young woman in her early thirties who grew up and lived in New Square – until she left it, her marriage and hasidism – has died.
The death could easily be a suicide and may have already been ruled as such.
Deb Tambor was allegedly sexually abused by a family member before she left New Square. I'm told that when she told the Sqvere rebbe about the sexual abuse he accused her of lying and was exceedingly mean to her.
Sqvere leadership treated her horribly, allegedly heaping money and support on her ex-husband and demonizing Deb, all in order to make sure she did not get custody of or normal visitation with her children.
Sqvere won that fight, but the demonization of Deb did not stop. Instead, Sqvere rabbis and teachers worked to alienate her children from their mother.
Eventually the pain of all of this became too great and Deb died. Many of her ex-hasidic, ex-haredi friends went to Rockland County for the funeral, which was delayed over and over and over again by Sqvere – delayed until the those ex-hasidic, ex-haredi friends finally left in the very early hours of this morning, many hours after they arrived to mourn her.
If this was a suicide, it was not her first attempt – she allegedly tried to kill herself once before, while she was still married and in New Square.
Depressive illness is one of the common problems that come from sexual abuse. Not all abuse victims get clinically depressed and, of those who do, only a minority kill themselves.
But two things are clear:
1. What Sqvere and Deb's ex-husband did to her was very likely to make her depression worse and,
2. Sqvere and her ex-husband knew about the sexual abuse and about Deb's depression and previous suicide attempt.
Whether Deb was self-medicating – something many abuse victims often do – or whether she intentionally killed herself, Sqvere, it's rebbe, and Deb's ex-husband bear significant responsibility for what happened.
Here was a woman who lost her children (to what objective cult experts call a cult) with the help of a judicial system so corrupted by hasidic bloc votes (and, allegedly, hasidic bribes) that a fair resolution of custody disputes involving Sqvere hasidim is almost impossible to achieve.
She was demonized. Her children were intentionally alienated from her by Sqvere and her ex-husband.
And she was tortured from the damage done by sexual abuse.
What Sqvere did to Deb Tambor Satmar and other hasidic groups have also done and are still doing to other former hasidim who opted to leave.
If this were the Amish or Scientology doing these horrific things to former members, the press would extensively cover the story.
Here these former hasidim (and, to tell the truth, a number of former non-hasidic haredim, as well) suffer in relative obscurity and silence.
It should not be this way.