By Shmarya Rosenberg http://www.shpoof.com
Monday, November 1, 2004
Boston, MA – More than 36 hours before polls close in California, John Forbes Kerry has declared victory and boarded a private jet for what aides called “a well earned vacation.”
Mr. Kerry, dressed in a dark blue jogging suit with a white vertical stripe, bounded up the steps to his airplane to the tune of “Hail to the Chief,” turned to face a crowd of aides, stepchildren, and former lovers, many of whom were waving giant inflatable ketchup bottles with the numerals “‘04” printed on them, and addressed those assembled.
“I’m going to Disney World!” a smiling Mr. Kerry shouted.
When asked about Mr. Kerry’s unusually early declaration of victory, a campaign spokesman was pragmatic.
“You gotta’ take while the takin’s good,” Ms. Fonda said. “In this country, democracy just isn’t enough.”
©2004 Shmarya Rosenberg
