By Shmarya Rosenberg http://www.shpoof.com
Monday, November 1, 2004
Raleigh, NC– John Edwards, the Democrat Vice Presidential candidate, has suffered a hairdressing accident that may impact on the final hours of the campaign.
Mr. Edwards stopped into Sharleeyn’s Blow and Curl for what aides called “a touchup and a bit of eyebrow work” Sunday afternoon after spending the day campaigning in his hometown.
Sharleeyn Davis Smith, the owner-operator of Sharleeyn’s Blow and Curl, was too distraught to speak with reporters. A spokesperson, who identified herself as Shontelle-Marie McNair, said that Ms. Smith was “out back balling her eyes out.”
Mr. Edwards' campaign staff refused to comment on the nature of the mishap or its implications for the campaign.
However, a neighbor, Jill Sue Davis-Lee, was in the salon at the time of the incident.
“It was the peroxide,” Ms. Davis-Lee, who is also Ms. Smith’s sister-in-law, niece and first cousin, said. “It didn’t react correct with the Light Auburn #448 highlighting she was doing on the senator. He’s got bright green eyebrows and streaks in his hair. He looks like one of those musicians from way back in the late ‘70’s. All the man needs is a mohawk and a ripped leather jacket with some safety pins and he’d fit right in.”
Early reaction from CBS News was defiant.
“This was a Halloween costume gone terribly awry,” Dan Rather reported. “Senator Edwards is a natural brunette, and quite an attractive one, if I don’t say so myself. Any allegations of regular hair coloring by Senator Edwards are partisan hen hockey.”
However, sources inside the Kerry campaign indicate that an internationally renowned wig expert was rushing to Raleigh to assay the situation.
“We got one of them Brooklyn sheitel-makhers,” the source said, referring to the wig expert. “By sundown, John will look better than he ever has. Guaranteed.”
©2004 Shmarya Rosenberg
