New Lakewood 'Modesty' Booklet

A new 'modesty' booklet, "You and Eye," was mailed to Jewish homes in Lakewood, New Jersey after Shavuot. Here are some sample pages.

Related articles

Haredi Modesty Sign In Midwood, Brooklyn

Lakewood Haredi Modesty Poster

More Haredi E-Rate Fraud?

Lakewood Haredi Scammer Eliyahu Weinstein, 2 Other Haredim, Allegedly Arrested - Again

Comments

[Eli Anonymous]

My resolution: When I get to a stop sign I will not look out my windows at all; I will iy"h just drive right through.

[Eli Anonymous]

BTW it looks like it's title "You and Eye" (not Eve)

[Yochanan Lavie]

This must be a parody. I'm jealous; I couldn't have done a better job if I tried.

[Shmarya Rosenberg]

Eli A –

Thanks. I fixed it.

[Mark H. Jay]

This is so very insanely bad that there is a kind of magnificence to it. No one could make this up. It stands as the most perfect thing of its kind, and it will never be surpassed (i.e. nothing will ever be worse). I salute the unnamed authors.

[Sarek]

I'd like to see the cop's face after the accident when the frummie tells him, " I couldn't look to see if anyone is coming in case I would accidentally see a woman."

[Jake24]

LOL!!!!!!!!

[Bas Melech]

The ridiculousness of the points in the first section ignores safety. Looking both ways when reaching a stop sign and looking at surroundings when coming out of a car are two examples.

Burkas and purda coming next

[jancsibacsi]

No one in their right mind would allow themselfs to be controlled to this degree of rediculousness,theese 1984 mind control tactics only happenes with cults and fanatic hassidim.

[NeverFrum]

There's no amount of psychotherapy that can cure the sickness that these people have.

[Atheodox Jew]

From the tone of his writing, the author Shlomo Meyer sounds like a truly good-hearted, friendly, sincere person. I almost feel bad pointing out how insanely whacked out the content is!

When it gets to the point where people who go into ShopRite or look down the block when they get out of the car are compared to the 80% of Bnei Yisrael killed in the plague of darkness (accd. to the Midrash), you know we've gone slightly off the deep end.

[Jeff]

"You and Eye"? Seriously?

[rebitzman - $101 to read my posts]

A quick Google search on "Shlomo Meyer Lakewood" seems to reveal this wasn't his first questionable decision.

[dov]

I don't get the midnight conversation one. What is that even supposed to mean??

[SkepticalYid]

It appears that Shlomo Meyer founded a Yeshiva that failed after just 3 years.

[RWisler]

I especially appreciate the warning about the preet'za'dik sluts who collect tolls. I purposely do not have an EZ-Pass. I am constantly aroused to a full erection and quite often ejaculate spontaneously when going through toll booths.

[jancsibacsi]

RWisler -- Youre sexual arousal is ok the main problem would bee if you would have an orgasm:))Then has vechulile all hell would break loose:)

[(The other) Eli]

Good point about the EZ Pass. If he had to see a woman manning the toll booth, that vixen might entice him to exit his vehicle and, chas v'sholom, dance with her.

I hope this booklet is in 2-ply so I can have some value to it

[Abracadabra]

I just want to know who Shlomo Meyer's dentist is and what goes on in his waiting room!

[Abracadabra]

I got it! It must be that all the female toll collectors use his dentist.

[Abracadabra]

Those poor babies are going to need some serious diaper rash cream, not to mention therapy. Forget asking about their toilet training! Freudian psychologists should ask these kids if they sat in dirty diapers overnight because their fathers didn't want to go to Shopright for fear of seeing........? Gosh - what DOES go on there at Lakewood's Shopright anyway?!

Shopright and the dentist's waiting room - Lakewood is just a den of temptation!

Frumma Yidden should just move out of Lakewood what with Shopright, stop signs, newspaper headlines, and those terrible dentists' waiting rooms. How about Iran? I hear they're good about keeping temptations like the palm of a woman's hand covered! In fact they're so good at it that they don't even need publications like "You & Eye." Government sponsored arrests and public floggings of those not adhering to modesty laws works wonders!

[Bas Melech]

I've seen a lot of this mishmeres hatznius stuff, but this I can't figure out. Although I disagreed with 99% of it, at least it had a logic of sorts to the thought process. The above contains nonsensical rantings of a mentally ill person, not a brainwashed one.

Does anybody know if the residents of Lakewood take any of this seriously?

[Sarek]

Damn! I thought it was something to do with me that I couldn't find a nice Jewish girl. But I now see that it's been the EZPass all along!

[WoolSilkCotton; I must be seen to be believed]

Could this be considered a copyright infringement on the title of the late great Rick James' song, You and I ?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVvEZByp_6M

[David]

+++I don't get the midnight conversation one. What is that even supposed to mean??

Posted by: dov | May 20, 2013 at 05:32 PM+++

It's code for something else....

[S M L]

"...I hope this booklet is in 2-ply so I can have some value to it..."

Yes, just like the old Sears catalog but of lesser quality...

[Abracadabra]

Posted by: (The other) Eli | May 20, 2013 at 06:49 PM

HOW can you POSSIBLY compare this Lakewood Shmiras Einayim pamphlet to toilet paper?! And WHO would ever think of using it as such?!

Toilet paper is MUCH softer!

[Hashtin_al_Hakir]

Typical sanctimonious Lakewood sophistry. Brought to you by the defenders of Kolko.
Lakewood = 24,000 talmidim of Rabi Akiva.

[S M L]

"...Toilet paper is MUCH softer!..."

True, but using this pamphlet is so much more satisfying..

[Jake]

Yikes
That doctor is a real doctor..
The uncle of a friend.
Double yikes,if she only knew....

[Abracadabra]

SML :P

[susieb]

Are they supposed to avert their eyes so that they do not see the all the evil acts that their neighbors are doing and not call the police! If they look too closely they may see a child being molested and then what will they do?

[99 Percent]

What is funny is using the wife as a Shabbos Goy. Funny because she is also the breadwinner, baby machine and the one who feeds the 6 children under 8 years old.

And this is supposed to be Torah.

[Eli, what me messiah?]

this is HILARIOUS! More! Please publish more! But can someone please explain to me what is really going on with the Kollel Family? "Going to Shoprite" is code for sneeking out for a quickie with your husband?

[Eli, what me messiah?]

I'm thinking of posting pictures of naked women on all the stop signs and stoplights in Lakewood and opening a chain of auto body repair shops.

I'm gonna be rich.

[Yochanan Lavie]

Apologies to Only The Good Die Young ------Billy Joel

Come out Miss Rivka, don't let me wait.
Bais Yaakov girls start much too late.
oy, but sooner or later it’s all beshert.
I might as well be the one.

Well, they showed you a Rebbe, told you to pray.
They built you a Temple and locked you away.
Oy, but they never sold to you at wholesale, oy vey
the pas yisroel buns
Only the good die frum.
That's what I said,
only the good die frum.
Only the good die frum.

You might have heard I run with some vilde chayas .
We ain't too dati, but it’s a mechayah.
We might be posting on Failed Messiah,
oy, but chumra bashing is fun.

So come on Miss Rivka, show me a sign.
Send up a siman, I'll give you a line.
The ten-foot mechitza you're hiding behind
is gonna come undone
Ketzel, only the good die frum.

I tell ya,
only the good die frum.
Only the good die frum.

You’ll get a nice white snood and a sheitel for your assignation.
You’ll get some challah rolls,
And a sheet with a hole.
But Miss Rivka, they didn't give you quite enough information.
You couldn’t count to three
And your school neglects the ABC’s.

They say there's Gan Eden for those who will croak.
Some say it's better, but it’s just a joke.
I'd rather laugh with old Shmarya and have me a toke,
Kefirim are much more fun.

You know that only the good die frum.
Oy vey, vey.
That's what I said,
I tell ya,
only the good die frum.
Only the good die frum.

Said, your rabbi told you "All that I could give you was a treif crustacean."
Oy, he never cared for me,
but did he ever use some Nair for free?

Come out, come out, come out Miss Rivka, don't let me wait.
Bais Yaakov girls start much too late.
Sooner or later it is all beshert.
I might as well be the one.
You know that only the good die frum

I'm telling you bubbie.
You know that only the good die frum.
Only the good die frum.
Only the good,
only the good die frum.

Only the good die frum.
Only the good die frum.

[Eli, what me messiah?]

YL, you're a genius.

May Shlomo Meyer include your lyrics in his next edition!

[typadder]

such a moomche...
he checks ur ology, and the cosmopology.
probably offers tutorology.

[Yochanan Lavie]

Thanks, Eli

[Eli Anonymous]

Dr Tomaszewski checks your shmekele but you're not allowed to check out Hunky Hank's shmekele? So unfair!

[Nigritude Ultramarine]

"Dentist appointments to be made only with a friend as a shmira in the waiting room".

I'm going to try this one, בלי נדר. I can't help myself when I read "Highlights for Children" -- I get "wood" whenever I read "The Timbertoes".

[Nigritude Ultramarine]

"Not to look up and down the block when getting out of my car".

Yes, let's not abandon all consideration for "situational awareness" and see how big a target when can make ourselves to be for rapists and muggers.

Seriously, this piece of advice should be avoided because it can get you killed or maimed. The person promulgating this has transgressed the מצוות לא תעשה of לפני עיוור לא תיתן מכשול.

[Nigritude Ultramarine]

"Dr. Charles A. Tomaszewski, MD A world of urological experience."

You don't need to go to medical school to get "a world of urological experience" -- just order a few pints at your local pub.

[anuran]

I'm thinking of posting pictures of naked women on all the stop signs and stoplights in Lakewood and opening a chain of auto body repair shops.

I'm gonna be rich.

Eli, I like the way you think

[Sarek]

YL, I'm still smiling from this.

[Wigmore]

Last week, Borough Park, I'm exiting my car and am nearly hit by a Hasidic kid riding a Razor Scooter. Kid was racing down the block WHILE LOOKING DOWN AT THE SIDEWALK!

I screamed at him, "look where you're going!" I suppose he told his father that a "goy" told him to be "pritzus."

[Bas Melech]

YL--
Great song!

[Yochanan Lavie]

Thanks, Sarek, Bas Melech.

What I don't understand is the admonition against reading bumper stickers.

[Nigritude Ultramarine]

"What I don't understand is the admonition against reading bumper stickers."

There's a wide spectrum of kefira that could placed on a bumper sticker. Stuff like:

"My Karma has run over your Dogma"

"Too stupid for science? Try Kollel!"

"Moshiach is coming! Are you swallowing that?"

"Keep your Theology off my Biology"

"Evolution is a theory. Creationism is a story."

Well, you get the idea.

[(The other) Eli]

What about haredi bumper stickers?

Gave head to my rabbi and all I got was this lousy bumper sticker

My son is on honor roll and can't speak English

Honk if your Rebbe's horny (hopefully they won't. Just imagine how much louder Williamsburg would be)

[Bas Melech]

YL--
I don't understand it either. Maybe it has to do with loitering or wandering eyes? Why must one wait before looking all ways at a stop sign or not looking up and down the block? Maybe he is telling men how to avoid wearing the new blinder glasses?

Like I said before, this guy sounds like he has a mental illness, not just brainwashed illogical thinking.

[Abracadabra]

NU & Eli - LOL!!!! Great bumper sticker humor!!

[Ben]

6a. Don't look both ways before crossing the road.

Anyone for some new Darwin awards?

[Yehuda fulda]

no wonder there are bumper stickers in lakewood that say "pray for me i drive in lakewood" everyone there is driving blind

[Yehuda fulda]

people dont go to shoprite at night because not only is the food half off so are the cltohes

[Nigritude Ultramarine]

"people dont go to shoprite at night because not only is the food half off so are the cltohes"

Store sign idea:

Rebbe Sale in the Men's Department. Boys' Pants Half Off.

[Yehuda Fulda]

I am Yehuda Fulda and did not post the above idiotic comment.