Magic Carpet Ride:Kabbalists To Fly Over Israel In Attempt To Ward Off Swine Flu

50 mystics to make effort at spiritual repair.

Mekubalim to Fly Over Eretz Yisrael in Response to Swine Flu
Yechiel Spira • Yeshiva World News

50 rabbonim, described as Mekubalim, will take part in a flight over Eretz Yisrael as part of a tikun against swine flu. They will recite tehillim, blow shofarot, and recite other tikunim as an act in  response to the spread of the illness in Eretz Yisrael, with three fatalities to date and some 20 people in serious condition in hospitals around the country.

According to Rabbi Benayahu Shmueli, rosh yeshiva of Nahar Shalom in Yerushalayim, the illness may chas v’sholom spread rampantly in Eretz Yisrael due to the “immorality and indecency” that exists. “To my sorrow, many in Am Yisrael are guilty of this” the rav stated.

The rav added it is not coincidental that one can become infected by mouth, explaining in the frum community the tikun lies in the mouth, the absolute need to stop loshon hora, calling on the tzibur to make a greater effort to guard one’s speech.

Comments

[effie]

I think Madonna needs to be on that flight.

[God]

Really, it would be much more effective if a vaccine was made available to a large portion of the population.

Flying Kabbalists!?! Sometimes you guys just crack me up.

[Pure Sephardic]

I can't see why this should harm anyone. I don't believe it would work but it's fine with me if they do. Just let it be.

[Yochanan Lavie]

Magic Kabbalah Ride (apologies to Steppenwolf)

I like to dream yes,in the pages of my kabbalah book
On superstition I drift in the night
Any place it goes is right
Let's drink ginger ale, over Eretz Yisrael

Nu, you don't know what we can find
Why don't you come with me maideleh
On a kabbalah carpet ride
You don't know what we can see
Why don't you tell your dreams to me
Davening will set you free
Cure the swine flu
Look inside Jew
Let the rabbis take you away

Last night I held Madonna's hand
And so I wished that I could stay
Before the girl could answer me
Well, her agent came and took her away
I looked around, Britney Spear's all I found

Nu, you don't know what we can find
Why don't you come with me maideleh
On a kabbalah carpet ride
You don't know what we can see
Why don't you tell your dreams to me
Davening will set you free
Cure the swine flu
Look inside Jew
Let the rabbis take you away

[WoolSilkCotton]

Who's paying for this insanity?

[seymour]

You know I think he is right the rebbie all the loshan hora about the doctors in hadassah.

You see people how easy it is, and the corrupt government are taking my money my taxes to create vaccine when all that is needed to be done is fly a few rabbis over the USA

Of course when the vaccine comes out they will say it was only because of the fly over.

All the news about the herediem lately is so absurd I think believing that harry potter is real is less crazy than this

[nobody]

Well, that's nice of them. Thoughtful.

[Dave Marshall]

This reminds me of the "Yogic Flyers", I think they were part of the Natural Party of Canada, in one of our federal elections about 7 or 8 years ago. They were going to help the economy by levitating above the ground ! I am not kidding ! See what you Americans are missing by not living up here. I am not even going to start talking about the Rhino Party of Canada !

[ah-pee-chorus]

niiice, YL.

[joseph K]

If it works and there is a vaccine for swine flu, will you be less skeptical?

[ah-pee-chorus]

call me a silly skeptic but i propose that all who believe this will help refuse the vaccine, and all the rest get vaccinated. we could then compare the rate of infection in both groups. you think they'll go for it?

[ah-pee-chorus]

i'm sure these holy men have far too much integrity to take credit if the vaccine prevents widespread infection, or to blame any widespread infection on the sins of the people.

[joseph K]

Dear Apikorus

WHy do you think the rabbonim are against vaccination?
We are all for it and in fact some of us have even helped with the efforts to develop a vaccine!
We think we need both tefillah, bitachon in hashem AND good science.
You are making a strawman position here, APC.

[maven]

YL: very nice, but why maideleh? All these guys are Sepharadi, it might have to be bachura or morenica or fermosa :)

[joseph K]

Not all mekuballim are sephardi

I am a mekubal and i am ashkenazi.

[ah-pee-chorus]

joseph K:

you are funny. you created a false strawman position for me, so that you could accuse me of the same. that is hilarious.
i never said the rabbis are against the vaccine. where did you create that from?i'm quite sure they are for it, so that if it works they can take partial credit.
thats why i proposed a partially controlled experiment.
nice try, though.

[ah-pee-chorus]

i am a mekubal, too.

i'm a mekubal, youre a mekubal, he's a mekubal , they're mekubals, wouldnt you like to be a mekubal toooooo. (sung to tune of dr. pepper commercial)

[joseph K]

No Rabbi would tell anyone not to get vaccinated, that is insane. The vaccine is a shlichus from the aibishter in response to our tefillos, thats all im saying.

[ah-pee-chorus]

++ The vaccine is a shlichus from the aibishter in response to our tefillos, thats all im saying.++=

Posted by: joseph K | August 05, 2009 at 09:17 PM

how do you know it is not just a shlichus from the scientists with no help from god? and to be fair, isnt the swine flu a shlichus from the aibishter as well?

[ah-pee-chorus]

++We think we need both tefillah, bitachon in hashem AND good science++

does that "good" science include evolution, geology,cosmology,embryology and archaeology?

[joseph K]

Of course good science needs evolution, so does good Torah (as Tiferes Yisrael pointed out).

Of course swine flu comes from Hashem, he wanted us to do teshuvah.

But he is also not a cruel God, he allows us a wonderful vaccine because we are davening and working hard to be good ovdei hashem.

[ah-pee-chorus]

so you and the torah agree that man evolved from great apes hundreds of thousands of years ago?

[joseph K]

The question isnt whether man evolved from Apes, thats for the scientist.
The question is what am I doing NOT to be an ape!

[ah-pee-chorus]

so if the scientist said we all evolved over billions of years from simple organisms, thereby disproving the torahs claim, you accept it? or ignore it as irrelevant?

++The question is what am I doing NOT to be an ape!++

i have a partial answer. i know that you are not using your better evolved brain to search for truth.

[Yochanan Lavie]

Thanks for your comments, APC, Maven.

[Chazak]

Chabad rabbis told me that its insane to believe in evolution. It ain't like they understand phylogenetics etc but um this Mekubaal Shem Tov stuff is pagan witchcraft and that makes each n every rabbi on that plane a Witch. Are you Jewish or a Witch (um or a Jewwitch?).

In any case they each would be lighter than.....wait for it..................................a duck.

[Chazak]

also we evolved from bony fishes way before tetrapod ape-like things. fishes you say? yeah fishes...we have gills still...what structure are they now?
yes Moishy in the back you had your hand up first....tell the class. Thats right Moishy the fish thing is behind the way our testicles descend as we mature. Why did you think that awkward descent was part of growth pattern?

[joseph K]

Look as a Mekubbal i think this will probably be ineffective, since most practical Kabbalah is not practiced in our Dor (Shaarei Deah 181) or will not work except with the highest neshama of the Dor (miPinenei Harav 344) or is just silly (Yalkut Aaron al Nefesh Shokekah 88n4).

But it makes it seem to the people like the Mekubalim care for them, which is a nice gesture, right?

[joseph K]

btw you know youre using evolution for kefirah is why many gedolim dont want it to be taught in charidishe schools?
so if you want peoples kids to learn evolution maybe you shouldnt use it as a jumping off point to kefirah and minus.
just saying.

[ah-pee-chorus]

as a fellow mekubal i can assure you it will do nothing but waste gas.
and i believe that convincing people that you have the ability to help them when you don't is cruel and immoral.

[Dave Marshall]

Joseph K, I agree with most of your posts.
As every knows Rav Samson Raphael Hirsch said that the theory of evolution was acceptable provided one acknowledged that Hashem was in control of evolution. I agree with that.

[joseph K]

Theoretically then can help them.
I do not know why they assume they are qualified though.
I do not assume I am and I am very advanced in this limmud.

[ah-pee-chorus]

is it possible that the reason they dont want it taught is that it shows the torah was wrong and therefore written by man?
i used to believe god wrote the torah until i found that all available evidence was to the contrary. evolution is one example. would you still want to follow the torah and claim god wrote it even if you knew it wasnt true?

[seymour]

what many people fail to realize it that hashem himself evolved, from a microbe and became hashem and then created the world.

So you see both are right

howver ai am a believer in George Kestanza who said and I quote "i believe in god for the bad things"

[ah-pee-chorus]

until a mekubal is willing to involve himself in a scientifically controlled experiment as was done to verify effectiveness of every vaccine, rational people are correct to reject them as fraudulent charlatans.

[ah-pee-chorus]

++provided one acknowledged that Hashem was in control of evolution++

dave, in what way would evolution look differently if it were not controlled by god?

[seymour]

is it possible that the reason they dont want it taught is that it shows the torah was wrong and therefore written by man?
i used to believe god wrote the torah until i found that all available evidence was to the contrary. evolution is one example. would you still want to follow the torah and claim god wrote it even if you knew it wasnt true?

Posted by: ah-pee-chorus | August 05, 2009 at 10:21 PM

and or that many of the Torah stories are just rehashed mystical stories of previous cultures.

and many laws are from the codes of Chamharabie

[Chicago Samson]

The day that these 50 Kabbalists fly over Israel, will be the day that "swine flew."

[A. Nuran]

Dave, at least the Rhino Party didn't take itself seriously.

[Hometown Postville]

Why don't they just stick pins in a pig as they fly over? They must have magical powers!

[Yonah]

Dave Marshall, I totally remember that. It was amazing! Not quite as good as the Holocaust Survivors/Pot Smokers Alliance though, which is still my favourite political party of all time.

[Dorian]

Joseph K. Wrote:

"...Of course swine flu comes from Hashem, he wanted us to do teshuvah............
...But he is also not a cruel God, he allows us a wonderful vaccine because we are davening and working hard to be good ovdei hashem...........
The question isnt whether man evolved from Apes, thats for the scientist.
The question is what am I doing NOT to be an ape!...........".......

First, you deny God personality. That God is not personal does not mean that He is not living, but only that “neither intellect nor will pertain to the nature of God.”
God does not discern, deduce, deliberate, or determine; rather, he acts out of the necessity of his own nature. What God does follows necessarily from what God is, “God is the immanent, not the transitive, cause of all things.”
We are not to think of God as Creator, but only as Being. The tendency to project and magnify what we perceive as traits of human excellence has always led the imagination toward the conception of an anthropomorphic deity.
However, God cannot be conceived by the imagination, but only by the intellect.

What you deny is that God is so weak that anything could supercede his laws and rules. The term “miracle” cannot be understood, then, to refer to any event that is contrary to Nature, but rather to an event the cause of which cannot be determined. Because men, separating
God from Nature, believed that God could mysteriously act apart from and in
contradiction to Nature, they gladly attributed to God any unique and surprising event. A miracle would, to these men, confirm God’s existence. However, for those who understand that nothing proves the existence of God more than the order that is preserved in Nature, the notion of miracle can only “cast doubt” on God’s existence
Miracle is, in fact, an impious notion of the imagination, for it stands
directly opposed to the idea of Law, and insofar as it suggests an arbitrary power greater than Law, it suggests Chaos....

The laws of nature flow from the necessity of the divine nature. God could never do something contrary to the laws of nature because then God would contradict Himself. And that would undermoie our confidence in God and lead to skepticism.
Miracles as so often 'experienced' by many people (religious or not) are actually impossible..

God to me is the first cause of everything in existence but that doens't mean that His nature is like our own just because He causes everything else. It also doesn't mean that he made us to fulfill some kind of need.
He is not the builder with a purpose or an end in mind. If God had the purpose of creation it would imply that God had some lack, something that was missing which IT needed to fulfill through our existence. But how could something that is infinite and perfect have any lack or need?
If something would be missing from God's work then God would not be an infinite being in a state of perfection..which I happen to think He IS.
I think the highest purpose of human existence is to come to now God as best we can. By studying, studying Nature and not subjugating it. That's where science comes in. NOT to give (clear) answers or to pretend to be a substitute for anything or to know the truth.
Some things are not to be (fully) understood but the more we can know about Nature the more we can know about God.
IN that context science becomes a spiritual path for getting closer to the Divine.

I have no doubt that you will suit your thoughts to what you claim is the written word of God and vice versa.
Conveniently because that rules out the possibility that 'a person' may have written it down.
You do not research nor investigate who wrote what, which periode etc.. and therefore dismisses the possibility that it may NOT be the way you thought.
Coveniently the term “chillul hashem' is practiced to shut up any rumours of any suggestion.
That is NOT Judaism , NOR has it anything to do with the heart nor the brain.
It is convenient selfimposed ignorance , plain stupidity, and..to use the favourit term “Chillul HaShem' (understatement!) because GOD itself has NOTHING to do with it NOR does IT want to!

NOw..please apply the above when thinking out spells on swine flu (...) or éven when you might think about the concept GOD.
You might even wanna try to rise above 'the ape' ...but than again..he wás created befóre us (as the story goes) ...

[tanya]

Go dorian, you rock!!!!

Does anyone believe in the power of the "unseen"? I do, from evidence and experience, the unseen has more control over any and everythng than I do for sure, proven under no uncertain terms.
So maybe flying around will somehow do what most cannot fathom. Who knows? maybe unseen powers will respond. Who knows? Not I, for sure.
Certainly not mere mortals.

[Dorian]

Hi Tanya!
"Does anyone believe in the power of the "unseen"?"...

Yeh, I do..but I don't fantasize about it nor do I digg into the Torah or other books what the meaning might be..because so and so is written so from that one can conclude that...Likewise with dreams..
You will NEVER get a satisfying answer because there is none for us (yet) to understand. We WANT to think we found it because it makes us feel good for the time being or makes you feel at peace with a situation. And indeed..it does and you might be right and your feeling tells you you're right... Nothing wrong. It's an eternal search.
But many people, and many within organised religion as in Judaism (...) demand answers, come to whatever conclusions, derive from that certain rituals and behaviour and if one does not live according to that and things happen it's because of...and take your pick. (remember how God reacted on Job's friends...)
That's NOT monism..that's paganism.

Paganism is a theological system which places rites and symboles between the men and their Creator. The originally meaning used to be "of the country", rural, rustic..But over time it has gotten another meaning.  It's contagious and once traces of paganism are allowed in, it erodes (the) religion with speed.
And in Judaism there are many pagan rites; the reïnstated pagan sacrifice of kaparot, blowing kisses to the mezuzah, even the maintenance of 'milk'and 'meat'dish sets.
The rite of putting on your right shoe first (because we start with the right things/loving kindness..) and lacing the left shoe first (restraint in tying etc..) may have a profound meaning but a rite remains a rite.
We laugh at those who kiss statues and icons, but how many Jews don't kiss the Torah scrolls..
Superstition is a belief that trivial things affect the divine will.
How many Hasidim don't visit the tomb of the Baal Shem Tov in Medzhibozh?
They probably don't give the Jews who were slaughtered there by Khmelnitsky, the nazi's and Petlyura a second thought but they go straight to pray at the tomb.
Praying at one's grave is the ultimate pagan rite.  Pre-Judaism Hebrews also worshipped ancestral spirits and the Torah eradicated that practice.
In Veyikra contact with deceased is a grave source of impurity; and the Torah speaks with repulsion of Saul when he employed a witch to communicate with the deceased prophet Samuel.
This prayer-rite is from Oriental/Arabic origin since the Arabs used to make shrines honoring deceased sheiks in the roads with water fountains for the travellers...
Soon it's Rosh Hasjanah and many men will shake their tzitzit at the seashore, symbolically shaking off their sins.
Ancient Greeks equally swam with pigs in Eleusinian mysteries; the sins were passed into the pigs...and JC did the same thing when he was pushing demons from insane man into pigs...

THAT to me is not being religious nor religion. There is no awe before God.
That God is a clerk busily writing down absurd superstitions.

SO..I think a lot (if not everything) comes down to the question how we see God, how we interpret Him and his 'powers'...
For me: God is real, He exists.  Intelligence, awareness and the sharp senses are more than just gifts from God. They are God's action in our life. And therefore it is more than tragic that most people forsake the living God for the sake of rituals, traditions, the dead sea books and their interpretersm (...).
The teaching of the Torah is simple, powerful and eternal. But there are GOD INSPIRED PASSAGES AND AN OVERLOAD OF PRODUCTS OF IMAGINATION .
The Torah's teaching should not be equated with rabbinism. Jews must return to the true fundamentals of (their) religion.  What we have now is often a man made, phoney religion called Judaism.

The basic idea of Israelite religion (again..as I think it is..)is that God is supreme over all. there is nothing around Him or outside of HIjm that has authority or severeignty over Him. Unlike man and the pagan gods the God of Judaism is not subject to laws, physical dependences nor time. He is not mythological in all that He is and does.   He has no ancestry, fathers, or generations of other gods. He doesn't inherit authority nor does He pass it on to other generations. He doesn't die and he doesn't depend upon other powers or things outside of himself.  God is completely independent.

[Nachum]

Dave Marshall, there was a Natural Law Party in the US as well. Same shtick.

Yonah, it was better than that: I think it was the "Holocaust Survivors and Green Leaf Graduates" party.

[Dr. Dave]

Amen Dorian

P.S. Chazak review your Python:

- a witch weighs the same as a duck because they both float so they are both made of wood so they burn.

And remember:

Ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny!!

I got better.

[Dave Marshall]

Dorian, excellent post, although I don't agree with everything you say.
Have you ever checked out the Karaites?
Try www.karaiteinsights.com or www.karaite-korner.org or karaites.org.uk
Although I am not planning to become a Karaite, since I don't agree with them totally, they've got a heck of a lot of good ideas. They address a lot of your concerns head-on, and they are still traditional- they believe in Torah mi'Sinai. I think the ideal Jewish society in North America would be 50% MO, about 30% Karaites, and 20% all other movements. It would be much more religiously healthy tht way.

[nobody]

Many medical experts say the "vaccine" is not necessary and won't solve the problem. That's because it's not fully proven as an effective vaccine yet. So why does one have to be a carpet flying mystic to agree with half of medical professionals who say the vaccination efforts are unnecessary at this point?

[maven]

Joseph K- great name, by the way, I once knew this guy with a name like that, he sort of just disappeared, no one knew why. Our mutual friend Gregor Samsa also just quit his job one day...

At any rate, with all due respect (and another nod to Eric Idle), I never heard an actual mekubal refer to himself as one.

[ah-pee-chorus]

do any of these guys do mystical car repair?

[Dorian]

to Dave Marshal:

I like the Karaïtes insofar that I agree with them that f.e. that it is unreasonable to believe that God would contradict Himself and that it is the personal responsibility of every individual to study the Scriptures and ultimately decide for themselves how he/she perceives and understands it's meaning .
But I don't f.e. agree on God as the 'creator' for reasons I explained in my previous mails; nor the concept that there would be an ultimate reward for those keeping the Torah.
However, I haven't study the Karaïtes enough to form a real opinion about it but thank's for the links. There's always something interesting to find that stimulates the grey mass!

To ah-pee-chorus !

Car repair !? I was thinking way bigger than that... If they're gonna make all the effort..what about 'repairing' my ever needy wallet and bank account? ? I mean, if you go for the impossible..
I'd like a lot of zero's...(which we have now..) but I'm aiming for that huge number in front...
Come on guy's..take off already!

[Joseph K]

Maven, thank you for finally getting the joke.

[maven]

*lightbulb* I shoulda known, there were very few mekoros quoting folks around here.

[Ben]

APC they probably do mystical car repairs. They fly over a neighbourhood and long behold people go into a car repair shops and some mechanics take some tools and work on those cars and mystically everything works! The cars are running again! But you have to understand and always remember that those mechanics succeeded in repairing of the cars only because the mystics flew over the area and chanted some prayers. Only mystics really really fix the casrs.

[maven]

Ben, (i may never forgive myself for writing what I'm about to write), they don't repair automobiles, they can only (...wait for it) fix your karma (I'm so ashamed).

[Jonathan]

Oy! If they do it on a magic carpet it might be worth something. Otherwise it's just a business gimmik to dupe the masses. Orthodox Judaism seems to be progressing rapidly in the wrong direction.

[Ben]

Maven, I disagree, the only reason your car is running all together (as well as everybody elses cars from China to US) is because these holy mystics pray for it. The moment they stop praying for our cars to run the cars will stop! There is no question about it!

[NotParticularlyFrumButSickOfBS]

I think it's nice of them to care.

And I believe that prayer works.