Truth In Kiruv? Not With Aish HaTorah, Woman Says

Woman says Aish claims to be unaffiliated with any Jewish stream, lures unsuspecting non-Orthodox Jews like her to participate in indoctrination sessions, trips.

Aish HaTorah – Being Reform in an Orthodox Setting
by elizabeth katzki, JWeeekly.com

I should have known that a trip advertised on the side of my Facebook page would not be what it seemed, but it just looked so enticing.  How could I not take advantage of a trip to New York (everything but the flight) for only two hundred dollars?  I decided to apply for the Women’s’ Future Jewish Enterprisers two-week trip in New York. 

One day later, after sending in my resume and background information to Aish HaTorah New York, I got a call back informing me that I had been accepted and should book my flight.  I did just that, and one week later, I was on my way to Newark Airport, excited and ready to meet important Jewish business people. 

I did meet important Jewish business people, such as William Lauder, Jill Granoff, Neil Cole, Robert Hormats, and many more, but these introductions came with information I did not necessarily want.  I understood that this was a Jewish trip, and I was excited to get in touch with my Judaism again, but I definitely did not want to hear about Orthodox Judaism day in and day out.  I am a Reform Jew, and I appreciate the denominational diversity of the Jewish people, but I was informed at the beginning of the trip that Aish HaTorah does not have any affiliation with any particular denomination of Judaism, so I was less than thrilled when bombarded with Orthodox Jewish opinions. 

I did have a good time, and I learned a lot, but I reached my breaking point when sitting down to lunch on Shabbat with a host family.  We began discussing Jewish rights of passage, and I told them that I was confirmed and that it was a very meaningful ceremony and process for me.  My heartfelt expression was immediately rebutted with a verse from a Jewish text stating that Jews should not take traditions from other religions and that confirmation was really not a Jewish event.  Now, I know that confirmation has Christian origins, but it was a very Jewish experience for me, and to have someone discount that, a fellow Jew at that, was heartbreaking.  If this statement had come from the mouth of someone who was not Jewish, it may not have hurt so deeply, but to find out that an experience that I considered so genuine and so Jewish, was wrong in the eyes of another Jew burned. 

I could not stop thinking about this conversation, and I still cannot stop thinking about it, but as the new week started with Havdallah that night, I became increasingly steadfast in my belief in Reform Judaism as the right Jewish path for me.  The more I disagreed with the Orthodox viewpoints presented to me, the more I thought about what felt right.  This Aish HaTorah trip redefined me as a Reform Jew and I thank them for that.

[Hat Tip: Joel Katz.]

Comments

[Joelteitelbaumlll]

Sounds like a lot of whining to me...she got her 200 bucks worth, and then some...so she ate lunch with a family that were a bunch of dolts...everyone has, and will...

[613kpiggy]

It is a shame that she didn't read:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aish_HaTorah

rather than:

http://www.aish.com/

[a reader]

with all due respect, this letter comes off sounding just a bit pathetic. while there is plenty to bash aish hatorah for, the only legitimate claim this woman has is that she thought aish hatorah was non-denominational. deceptive as this may be, chabad is also famous for making similar pronouncements (this is their mantra on college campuses - "we're not orthodox, etc....we're just jewish"). bottom line is that this woman simply did not do her due diligence. any simple google search for aish hatorah would have told her all she needed to know. she has only herself to blame for any orthodox overtures she was exposed to after learning that aish was behind the trip. jews for jesus also probably claims to be non-denominational, but if i went on one of their trips i would expect to hear about salvation in jesus once or twice.
as a result, its hard to have sympathy for her host's comment about her confirmation. a jew (or any human) can have a religious experience in many settings - attending a mass, or a mosque, temple, bowing to an idol, etc.. but that doesn't make any of those experiences 'jewish' per se, rather simply religious. this woman's confirmation is no different (the fact that it occurred in a temple notwithstanding), and the response she got was reasonable. the fact that she was so shaken by her host's reaction (so much so that she feels a need to declare to the world "...I became increasingly steadfast in my belief in Reform Judaism...") only points to this woman's less than balanced religious/emotional equilibrium.

shmarya, the stories you feature are generally much more timely/significant. this one is just sad/ a little pathetic.

[peter]

I remember while I was going to Aish that students were "hired" to work on the website material, staff the offices, etc. Assuredly some of it was "quantified" work-study, but some of the research work and public image of the group is largely on the part of devotees who were totally sold themselves. I was told by those engaged in it of falsifying sources for website articles, building artifaces, since "our enemies" are doing it, etc. These guys are steeped in an environment of "we're at war, and all is fair in love and war - and this, raboisai, is a war of love - THE war and THE love"...

[nobody]

Anyone with enough baseline knowledge and even an ounce of objectivity knows that "Reform Judaism" is not Judaism. Therefore, when they teach you "orthodox viewpoints," (haredi extremism and fundamentalism aside) they are generally teaching you JEWISH opinions, or opinions within Judaism. If you don't like that fine, but saying it "feels Jewish to me" isn't what makes something Jewish or not Jewish. This author comes off sounding like a fool.

[Shmarya]

This author comes off sounding like a fool.

Self incrimination?

[DK]

I can't believe that Big Aish is acting deceptively in this manner. It is highly unusual for a kiruv organization to be anything but transparent and upfront about their agenda.

[WoolSilkCotton]

Couldn't she have politely excused herself and just left at any point?

[Yonah]

I thought everybody knew Aish was Orthodox?

[613kpiggy]

While their website isn't that clear
Aish is known as a kiruv organization.

[itchiemayer]

Just because something "feels right" means very little. It is a very shallow argument. She actually comes off like a whining fool. She goes on a trip with a group about which she doesn't bother researching? Pathetic. My heart bleeds for her. Frankly, I'm not a big fan of Aish either, but this woman is a fool, and I bet she hardly ever sees the inside of a temple.

[Dave Marshall]

The weakness of Reform is that it thinks most mitzvot are optional and that Torah study to some extent is optional, (and forget about Talmud study, except a few rabbis). So because they've rejected intensive learning, they have taken themselves out of the Jewish debate, since they don't know enough. So they miss a lot of the richnesss of Jewish tradition and substitute it with Thomas Mann, Kafka, and other western philosophy. Also as far as their siddur is concerned, they never go beyond about 25 percent Hebrew. So there's no growth. Why not instead teach the congregants to read all the prayers, and maybe read 75 percent in Hebrew and 25 percent in English, OR read everything in Hebrew and then the same passages in English (that's what I do at home)?

[Michael Lesher]

Most posters seem to be concentrating on the responsibility of this woman to know the identity of the organization she was dealing with -- caveat emptor. The point may be well taken, but what seems more important is what the story says about Aish.

That responsible people shouldn't be taken in by deceptive tactics doesn't justify the deception. And let's face it, many of Aish's tactics are based on deception -- not only in marketing but in teaching methods as well. This is something that should give us pause.

As a B.T., I've had plenty of reason to reflect on Orthodox outreach methods. And as time passes I feel surer than ever that honest teaching has more religious value than indoctrination -- that spreading knowledge about Judaism is more important than converting X number of people to Orthodox observance, and that we cheapen Torah by supporting institutions that try to advance Judaism the way one advances a party line.

[Dorian]

Ok..the lady could have and should have informed herself better on Aish HaTorah...but she didn't. You may call it foolish or whatever.. She stated however that she did have a good time and learned a lot nevertheless.
BUT...with all due respect to orthodox Judaism.
There is something that is called 'Derech Eretz'...remember that one!?
You do not insult your guest or make him/her feel uncomfortable.
The host should and could have said: "In orthodoxism we have a different view on this..." Or he could have offered her another drink instead...tact!
I host many people at our table weekly with even more opinions than possible..
And I never made my guests feel uncomfortable or hurt them by slapping them around the face with my opinion.
That's cruel,sick and is far beneath any Jew. This so called orthodox Jew could have known and should have known better...but He didn't!
Orthodox...Jew? Neither he was...

[Dave Marshall]

One thing I do object to about many Orthodox people, is their "all or nothing approach". However, one Orthodox rabbi once told me "we all do mitzvot, some do more and some do less, but we are all growing in mitzvot". I think that's a much more constructive attitude.

[itchiemayer]

Dorian - Point well taken about sensitivity.
Dave Marshall - correct about all or nothing being the wrong attitude to have. Look, my father is 88 and continues to put on tephillin every day, go to minyanim once or twice a week, and keeps kashrus in the home. He also drives to shul on shabbos and will eat dairy out. Would it be better if he didn't put on tephillin, not go to any minyanim, and not keep kashrus in the home? Surely not. Something is far, far better than nothing.
Good shabbos to all. Dave Marshall - enjoy your new modern orthodox shul!

[Dave Marshall]

Thanks Itchie. Shabbat Shalom.

[Radical Feminist]

I was "confirmed" it just meant two more years of studying Judaism, Jewish history etc..
I agree with the author, living as a Haredi Jew made me more appreciative of my Reform upbringing and a new commitment to see the reform movement gain new members.

[SJ]

I've seen orthodox jews say "I'm not orthodox i'm just jewish" before. One girl said to paraphrase it's to separate themselves from the politics of calling oneself orthodox and just be halachic.

But, when it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, etc ..............

[WoolSilkCotton]

Anytime you're invited to a trip that sounds too good to be true, and/or too inexpensive to make sense, you have to figure they're trying to sell you something, like those vacations to the Poconos where they try to sell you time shares or property.

At some point after you arrive you're going to get the hard sell treatment, so just suck it up and enjoy the cheap vacation, excuse yourself and leave, or stay home.

[Chicago Samson]

A wise old sage once said to me, "When it comes to truth-telling, one is forbidden to tell a lie, but on the other hand, there is no mitzvah to scream out the truth." The Aish family would have been much wiser and more polite to keep certain opinions to themselves; in the final analysis, you cannot expert to teach someone the whole Torah while standing on one foot.

[WoolSilkCotton]

And you certainly can't teach someone Torah while standing on THEIR foot.

[Neo-Conservaguy]

However, one Orthodox rabbi once told me "we all do mitzvot, some do more and some do less, but we are all growing in mitzvot".,

This is the closest thing to an accurate, "authentic" understanding of the historical reality of the Jewish experience, with the understanding that the final part of the comment is more rabbinic wish than reality. BTW, to be clear, it's my hope as well.

[Neo-Conservaguy]

The weakness of Reform is that it thinks most mitzvot are optional and that Torah study to some extent is optional, (and forget about Talmud study, except a few rabbis). So because they've rejected intensive learning, they have taken themselves out of the Jewish debate, since they don't know enough. So they miss a lot of the richnesss of Jewish tradition and substitute it with Thomas Mann, Kafka, and other western philosophy.

I spent a few years in a Reform Temple, so I've earned the right to kvetch about it. These comments are on target. In addition, although I met a few Jews in that setting that were very committed to their version of Jewish practice, the vast majority of the "congregation" did little other than showing up at the high holidays (even more so than Conservative and Orthodox shuls). What they substitute, however, is Attitude with a capital "A", and that's what I read from the comments made by the woman in the article. BTW, to say I have no lost love for Aish and their lying, evil tactics would be an understatement. They give religious Jews a bad name. However, Reform Jews that throw out lines like, "but I'm PROUD of being Jewish" (rather than doing anything), drive me absolutely crazy.

Also as far as their siddur is concerned, they never go beyond about 25 percent Hebrew. So there's no growth. Why not instead teach the congregants to read all the prayers, and maybe read 75 percent in Hebrew and 25 percent in English, OR read everything in Hebrew and then the same passages in English (that's what I do at home)?

I like to read prayers in English too, and my interlinear siddur facilitates that very well. Understanding the words you are speaking is critical in Judaism - there isn't supposed to be a sense of Divinum Mysterium" with prayer. Remember, throughout the liturgy is interspersed Aramaic "translations" of critical ideas so that the reader will understand the prayers!

BTW, the newer Reform Siddur is a significant improvement to the old Gates of Prayer work, and (re)incorporates most of the traditional European/Ashkenazic nusach. It's laid out very nicely with Hebrew, transliteration, translation, and commentary on each page.

[MalachHamovies]

Where are the reform and conservative movements with all of their money ? If they believe so strongly in their views, why don't they try to "mekarev" orthodox jews to their thinking ?

Wouldn't that be a hoot if that would happen ?

[Dave Marshall]

Thanks, Neo-Conservaguy, I am glad we agree. I too was a member of a Reform synagogue. In fact I've tried all streams. Now I am back to (Modern) Orthodoxy.

[spitz]

Living in California and part of the conservative movement, I can honestly say that I did not know that Aish was an orthodox organization until someone told me about their nephew’s experience. You can't find that info anywhere on their site, so I would say this woman did her research and asked all the right questions. What exactly does a "Future Jewish Enterprisers two-week trip in New York" for 18 -25 year olds have to do with Orthodox Judaism? The article below explains it all.

http://www.jewishsocialist.org.uk/aish.html

613kpigg- Yes it's a shame she didn't read
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aish_HaTorah
rather than:
http://www.aish.com/

but one would think that a Jewish organization would be honest. Visit www.aishconnections.com (Does this seem like an orthodox organization?)

Itchiemeyer- There was nothing whiney about her article. It was factual and to the point. It doesn't matter how many times a person puts on Teffillin in his life, it matters how he treats the people around him. People need to respect other's opinions and views. Disrespecting someone for their beliefs does not make a "good jew", nor does name calling. That is pathetic.

All the negative comments seem to be coming from judgmental orthodox Jews.

Dave Marshal- You cannot generalize Reform Judaism just as you cannot generalize Orthodox Judaism. Some of the reformed temples here seem to keep their youth involved many years beyond becoming a Bar Mitzvah and yes “Bat Mitzvah” where girls are treated equally, so they must be doing something right.

MalachHamovies- The wonderful thing about reform Judaism is that they accept people and their views for who and what they are. They don’t feel the need to push their beliefs. Those tactics are for narrow-minded fear-mongering people.

And as an FYI for all of you who said, “why not leave?” Aish will not let you leave their program without paying them back for the total cost of any particular program. They have the brainwashing techniques down.

[Brian]

I agree with some that she sounds like she's whining.

My wife came back from her Aish trip and started wearing long skirts. Get her to stop buying un-heschered croutons? Notsomuch. What I gather from her, however, is that she was unaware the whole time that Orthodox Judaism was being pushed on her, even if it very subtly was.

On the other hand, you'd think that Reform Jews would be taught some understanding that they're going to need thick skin when it comes to their beliefs. For crying out loud, while they might retain post-bar mitzvah youth longer than Conservative shuls, if their liturgy didn't run like davening for dummies (and repetative ones at that) I'd perhaps take them more seriously.

[C-Girl]

" If they believe so strongly in their views, why don't they try to "mekarev" orthodox jews to their thinking ?"

They do- by sitting out a generation or two and waiting for the assimilated children and grandchildren of orthodox or orthoprax families to come to *them*. It's remarkably successful, judging by their numbers.

[spitz]

Perhaps C-girl didn't read this part of my post. Judaism should not be treated like politics.

MalachHamovies- The wonderful thing about reform Judaism is that they accept people and their views for who and what they are. They don’t feel the need to push their beliefs. Those tactics are for narrow-minded fear-mongering people.

[spitz]

Sorry c-girl, You're right! I misread your post.

[sarak]

As a past participant of an Aish trip, I find it extremely hard to swallow this author's accusation that she was mislead about the affiliation of the organization. When I asked during the interview process, I was told the rabbis teaching our classes would all be Orthodox, but that the other students would come from all backgrounds, and I have no doubt she would have been told the same thing had she asked.

More importantly though, what exactly is the objection to hearing information that one may not agree with, particularly if that disagreement serves to solidify and affirm one's own system of belief? It's not as if Aish demands participants refund them the full value of the trip if they fail to become deeply observant when they return home. If she merely seeks to inform others of Aish's mission to educate other Jews about their particular perspective on Judaism, I'm sure the organization appreciates her marketing efforts. However, she seems determined to prove she was somehow the victim of a malicious scheme...but to what end?

While I agree with other commenters that the host family's approach to informing her of their point of view was perhaps harsh, we live in a country where we are entitled to hold and express our religious beliefs freely. I fail to see how she was harmed in any way by this undoubtedly educational debate, and I cannot imagine what she hopes to accomplish by publicly airing these grievances, other than to penalize Aish for their organizational viewpoint.

[Neo-Conservaguy]

" If they believe so strongly in their views, why don't they try to "mekarev" orthodox jews to their thinking ?"

They do- by sitting out a generation or two and waiting for the assimilated children and grandchildren of orthodox or orthoprax families to come to *them*. It's remarkably successful, judging by their numbers.

Speak for yourself. Oh wait - you are :-) And we're all proud of you, too.