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July 16, 2009

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Dr. Dave

It's still a step in the right direction

Ben

Yes, it is the first step of a 1000 mile journey. The thuth is that Amar showed no intention in the last 2 years to travel the other 5 million steps of that trip.

The trip must not be postponed till Mashiah comes and resolves all the issures.

Sherman, Eisenstein, Attias and the rest of the cruel erev ravs must be put in cherem. If this is not done, then rabbinate credibility will be damaged forever.

ah-pee-chorus

++If this is not done, then rabbinate credibility will be damaged forever++

isn't that like saying bernie madoff's trustworthiness as a fund manager will be damaged forever?

ah-pee-chorus

the rabbinate stated that if this man would be willing to hit a parking lot attendant with his car while attempting to avoid paying they would fast-track his conversion so that he may become a rebbe and a dayan.

Asa

I'm surprised the court neglected to further prove his invalidity as Jew by pointing out that he continued to wear pants post-conversion.

Yochanan Lavie

Asa: This proves that Scotsmen are ancient Israelites, as some have alleged. They don't wear pants.

Asa

Also no underwear, which proves that Adam was a Scotsman.

Ben

I wait for Amar to act on his now 2 year old promise to cancel Shermann's decree, which put thousands of Rav Drukman's converts and their families in limbo. The very same decree put All the converts and their children on life long probation.

The question that bothers me is Amar forgetful or simply evil, just like Shermann and Elyashiv and Attias and Eisenstein and full list of other criminals hiding behind Rabbinic titles and religious garbs?

ah-pee-chorus

YL: how bout a "you say you want a revolution" parody? if that has been done,forgive me.

Yochanan Lavie

You say you believe in evolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the Jews
You tell me it's a revolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the Jews
But when you talk about conversion
Don't you know that you can count me in
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right

You say he got a real solution
Well, you know
We'd all love if Amar's "da man"
You ask me for a contribution
Well, you know
We're schnorring all we can
But when you want money
for Yidden with minds that hate
All I can tell is bochur you have to wait
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right
Oy

oy, oy, oy, oy, oy...

We say we want a constitution
Well, you know
There's a shoe upon your head
You tell me it's the institution
Well, you know
You better free you mind instead
But if you go carrying pictures of chairman Rebbe
You ain't going to make it with anyone and that's heavy
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right
all right, all right, all right
all right, all right, nu "all right, already!"

maven

YL, when do we get a revolution number 9 parody :)

Yochanan Lavie

Why not? I want a revolution in traditional Judaism concerning how converts are treated. So count me in!

maven

And while we're on the White Album, I've become inspired by our friend Yochanan:

Have you seen the little frummies
throwing rocks and dirt
yet for all the littlelest frummies
Life is getting worse
Always having dirt to play around in.

Have you seen the bigger frummies
In their starched white shirts
You will find the bigger frummies
Stirring up the dirt
Always have fires in their trash bin.

In the streets with rich American backing
They take care to destroy all that’s around
In their eyes society’s lacking
What Chilonim need's a Satmar thwacking!

With the wives in bondage there's lots more frummies
Living deprived lives
Who can grow up yelling at sinners
And their educated wives
Casting rocks and flamess to destroy their shikun....

Thank you, thank you very much, you've been a great audience.

ah-pee-chorus

YL: i love it. and you worked in the shoe. genius.

Yochanan Lavie

Thanks APC. Good job, Maven.

justayid

"source close to Amar said that S.V.'s father was a Moroccan Jew, like the chief rabbi, which facilitated dialogue. Amar made aliya from Casablanca in 1962, at age 14."

"why isnt the other new ger's conversion being recognized"
"I am shocked, shocked I tell you, to find he does not keep kosher"


"why did you come to yerushaliyim?" "to see the liberal minded haredim" "There ARE no liberal minded haredim in yerushaliyim". "I was misled"

"you must remember this, a bris is still a bris, on that you can rely. The fundamental requirements of conversion still apply, as time goes by"

justayid

"of all the shteibels in all the shtetls in the world, she walks into mine"

(pardon the blatant ashkenazi bias)

justayid

oh dear, some googling leads me to the conclusion others came up with "a bris is still a bris" before I did.

But am I the only who hears bohemian rhapsody and thinks Queen is singing "BrisMillah" instead of "Bismillah"

maven

Freddie Mercury would have been happy to sing of bris milah. Though a parody of Bohemian Rhapsody in this setting might start:

Momma, just starved your son...

ah-pee-chorus

good one, maven.

Dr. Dave

Freddie would have liked metzitza b'peh

Yochanan Lavie

Freddy's real name was Farrokh Bulsara. He was a Parsi, an Indian of Persian descent. I believe they are Zoroastrian, although "bismillah" is Arabic for "In the name of God."

Not that anyone asked.

maven

Hey, does anyone know what Freddie Mercury's original name and religion was? :)

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