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July 02, 2008

BREAKING! Serial Sex Abuser Rabbi Mordechai Gafni Returns, Denies Guilt

The man has a 30 year track record of seducing and manipulating women he counseled and taught. At least one of those women was very much underage.

He ran through a series of defenders in the Orthodox community until there were no more left.

Then…

Gafni 2008-1

…Gafni admitted his wrongdoing, claimed to be withdrawing from public Jewish life to get counseling, and disappeared.

Now, two years later he has resurfaced in Salt Lake City. He's playing the victim, claims to have been set up and railroaded, and he has a whole new set of defenders – many of them non-Jews. The defense rests primarily on what his defenders call consensual sexual affairs with women he taught and counseled during the last years of his career and on a bizarre conspiracy theory that only holds together, to the little extent that it does, if you believe Gafni's personal account of events and take his paid consultants' word as truth.

What these defenders do not deal with is the long, clear record of abuse, manipulation, lies and deceit carried out by Gafni over his entire career.

Hanging out with shamans and practitioners of the "magik arts," Gafni has again found a group of people naive enough to believe his lies.

Catalyst Magazine, a Salt Lake City-based new age publication, has a laughable "exoneration" of Gafni in its July issue that focuses on the personalities of The Awareness Center's Vicki Polin and blogger Luke Ford.

No accuser of Gafni is spoken to. No victim is contacted. Indeed, no one critical of Gafni is quoted and exposé's on Gafni abuse – like Ma'ariv's and the New York Jewish Week – are ignored. In the business, this is what is known as a love letter, a piece that your very own PR person could have written.

Perhaps that is because for the past year, Gafni has been a columnist for Catalyst Magazine, writing under a pseudonym but with his true identity known to the editors. That Catalyst would allow someone like Gafni to write anonymously speaks to the magazine's lack of credibility and ethics.

Two examples:

1. Catalyst claims that Gafni passed lie detector tests administered by Gordon Barland. But Catalyst does not quote Barland or tell us what questions were asked.

2. Catalyst also claims "even by Israel’s strict standard, in no way did [Gafni] break the law." This is false. Gafni fled Israel as soon as the story about his clergy abuse broke. Israel rarely indicts non-violent criminals who have already fled the country. If Gafni tried to return to Israel, the legal process will restart.

Here is Gafni's explanation of his latest actions as quoted by Catalyst, notable for its disingenuousness:

“Of course, I regret with all my heart that anyone experienced hurt through their relationship with me. And, remember what Bono sings? ‘We hurt each other and we do it again.’ The key is what we do with our hurt,” Gafni says. “But what I most deeply regret is that I allowed myself to jeopardize the work we were doing by engaging in these relationships. I believed that what we were doing was sharing love, and that therefore there was nothing ethically, and certainly not legally, wrong. I still believe that. But I also recognize that a spiritual teacher has to hold strong boundaries around his personal life. Even mutual relationships with powerful and autonomous women are a problem for a public teacher. Moreover, in retrospect, our relationship did not serve the highest growth of these women; it endangered our movement and let down my supporters, friends and partners. In that sense—although I was unconscious of it at the time—they were unethical relationships and I regret that deeply.”

That's right. An Orthodox-ordained rabbi sleeping with multiple women (sometimes at the same time, each without the other's knowledge) he counsels and teaches views his actions as "sharing love" and sees "nothing ethically, and certainly not legally, wrong." All he sees is the damage the exposure of these "love-sharing" episodes had on his income and power. Like most abusers, it is all about me. It is never, ever about the people he hurt and the lives he ruined.

I met Mordechai Gafni on Purim in Jerusalem in 1994 or 1995. As I wrote previously, my reaction – which was shared by the Chabad rabbi whose home we were in, and by all the others present – was that Gafni was a con man and a fraud.

None of us knew then about Gafni's history of abuse. But his fundamental dishonesty was strikingly clear.

Gafni Background.

Gafni Background 2 and 3.

Catalyst Magazine Love Letter To Gafni.

[Hat Tip: RebTzvi.]

Comments

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This man has to be stopped. Who do you expect to do this? Rabbiem? The man must be put in JAIL, in open population, and everyone told what he is.
This is the problem with our community. Everyone hides behind L'Oshen Hara, thinking this is the cure all, end all.

Another vast conspiracy. He should compare notes with the other Mordechai pervert, Tendler.

the problem is now that he has a legal precedant from tendlers case that seducing women is not a greater crime because he was counseling them or teacging etc.

the problem is now that he has a legal precedant from tendlers case that seducing women is not a greater crime because he was counseling them or teacging etc.

What a let down. Those of us who have known him for years, and have been following his exploits (his xxxploits) through his multiple reincarnations from right wing orthodoxy to New Age guru, can only be disappointed that after his disappearance in Salt Lake all he can do is whine. We were hoping he'd reemerge in Toldos Aharon, or as a Zen Roshi, or a Mormon elder, but I guess he's out of ideas... Luckily for us, of course.

The following was sent through The Awareness Center's daily newsletter yesterday.

Rabbi Mordechai Gafni Living in Salt Lake City, Utah
© (2008) The Awareness Center
www.theawarenesscenter.org/


Over the last few years various individuals have been monitoring Rabbi Mordechai Gafni's where abouts. After fleeing Israel, Gafni took a brief respite in Boston, prior to moving to Salt Lake City, UT. We notified law enforcement there, yet because the women in Israel were to afraid to file a police report, it was impossible for the Israeli police to file a red notice with Interpol.

The Awareness Center was just informed that Mordechai Gafni is now going under the pseudonym Marc Israel and has married. He is now on his fourth wife. Considering the fact that Marc Gafni (AKA: Marc Israel) has confessed to sexually assaulting a thirteen-year-old girl over twenty years ago, and two years ago confessed to clergy sexual abuse with several Israeli women -- it is nearly impossible to believe he is capable of stopping his sexual predatory behavior. There have also been rumors going around that Gafni is attracted to pre-pubescent boys.

We need your help to make sure all women and children in Salt Lake City aware of Gafni's presence. I've been told the picture above is very close to what he looks like today. If anyone has more updated information and or a more recent picture of him, please forward it to The Awareness Center immediately at: [email protected]

For more information about the case of Rabbi Mordechai Gafni go to:
http://www.theawarenesscenter.org/gafni_mordechai.html

-----------------------------

From The Awareness Center's Web Page

WARNING:
Marc Gafni Should Be Scene As A Danger to Women and Children.
Born as Marc Winiarz, Marc Gafni changed his name several times using multiple spellings. Winiarz is also known as Mordechai Winiarz, Marc Gafni and or Mordechai Gafni..

Winiarz/Gafni grew up in the midwest, yet went to both high school and college in New York. After college he became a Rabbinical student at Yeshiva University, yet did not get his rabbinical ordination (smeicha) from YU. Instead, Mordechai Gafni obtained his ordination from Rabbi Shlomo Riskin.

In 2004, Rabbi Shlomo Riskin, the spiritual leader of the Israeli community of Efrat, was going to revoke the rabbinic ordination he gave Rabbi Winiarz/Gafni many years ago when they had a close rabbi-student relationship. When Gafni heard of Rabbi Riskin's wishes, he wrote a letter "returning" his semicha to spare his former teacher any further embarrassment.

In the early 1980's, when Mordechai was nineteen he sexually abused a thirteen-year-old girl in her home. It wasn't until many years later that Marc Gafni confessed to the molestation while being interviewed by Gary Rosenblatt, editor of the New York Jewish Week. Marc stated: "I was a stupid kid and we were in love," the rabbi said. "She was 14 going on 35, and I never forced her"
In 1983 Mordechai Winiarz was married to his first wife. He was also a youth leader for a group called "JPSY" (Jewish Public School Youth). The group involved working with at risk teenagers. It was during this time he was accused of molesting a fifteen-year-old girl and an attempted sexual assault of a young adult woman. At the time the rabbis accused him of cult like practices. Both women went to various rabbis looking for help, yet nothing was done except he was chased out of town, moving to Boca Raton, Florida. There was some sort of scandl and he fled Florida suddenly.

In 1991 he left the Unitied States to start a new life in Israel, changing his name to Mordechai Gafni.
May, 2006 new allegations were made against confessed child molester Rabbi Mordechai Gafni . This time the allegations were made by three women who filed a complaint with the police in Haifa (Israel). The new claims were of professional sexual misconduct / clergy sexual abuse. The alleged offenses occurred during Torah lessons given by Gafni.

Immediately after the charges were filed Rabbi Mordechai Gafni confessed and fled Israel for the United States. He first landed in Boston, MA, where it is believed he stayed with one of his many female friends. There were rumors that soon after arriving in Boston he continued on to Boulder, CO and stayed with a colleague and then moved on to Salt Lake City, Utah.

Marc Gafni is involved with the Buddhist community of Salt Lake City. It is believed that he is in the process of trying to reinvent himself again as he did back in the 1980's after the first allegations were made against him of child molestation. Marc Gafni is considered dangerous to women and to both male and female children. Rumors are floating around that he is involved in BDSM community (Bondage, Discipline, Domination, Submission, Sadism, Masochism).

The Awareness Center is seeking justice for all of the survivors of Rabbi Mordechai Winiarz (past and present). If you have any information regarding the current location of Rabbi Marc Gafni please notify The Awareness Center, Inc.

The Awareness Center, Inc.
443-857-5560
e-mail: VickiPolin @ aol.com

I am so curious if you have any more info on rabbonim reacting negatively to to the chafetz chayim's works on shmiras halashon. I have long felt that by setting an impossibly high standard, they caused the area to be abandoned (practically) as a reachable standard.

I meant "he caused"

It's very convenient. Anytime a guy is accused of sexual abuse, he can blame Vicki Polin and Luke Ford.

Let's not forget that Gafni's record goes all the way back to when he was director of Kiruv that had and office at YU.

This program was for public high school Jewish teens.

They forced him out and we have testimony in print from underage victims right down the words Gafni used as he had sex with them on a shabbaton. Gafni's admission was and i quote..more or less
'She was 15 going on 25. '

Meaning of course the little girl seduced him.

This is if you remember what fathers generally say about their daughters when asked to explain their incestuous relationship. "What could i do. She is a whore or slut.'

But of course he is back.

Gafni will fight this.

He real name is Winearz. He is a very wealthy aggressive individual.

Now if things go his way and I give it even odds to better, some of his detractors that were embarrassed into condemming him after supporting him like Saul Berman and Zalman Schachter will make room for him.

Although I have not read the entire record from the Kabbalah Sex Community he ran, I can say though that it will not be easy to get him into court.

It will be harder to press charges to the fullest extent of the law.

Look he got away and did not even need a get out of jail free card for have sexual intercourse with young girls. No one said a peep. The few who did got blasted by others.

truly a conspiracy, anti-semites are clearing his name only to discredit judaism. we can't allow this kind of tactic to work, or these kinds of creeps to manipulate the media like that. anyone can say anything these days! it's a ridiculous shame how much can get published without really knowing what happened. what else could be their motivation? it must be a conspiracy.

Shit! He bears a striking resemblance in this photo to Eagle's bandmate Don Henley (who ironically was once caught doing cocaine with a 15 year old hooker. This info which was prominently displayed on his wiki mysteriously disappeared recently).

It is interesting that Gafni states that he was "unconscious..at the time" of the unethical nature of his relationships. Well, if he as a man (and adam mu'ad l'olam) was really unaware of it, then this could only mean one thing, spiritually: that his derech was completely wrong. How can a person be a teacher and a spiritual mashpi'a in the House of Israel and not be aware of what is and what is not a permitted or an ethical relationship? I assume his teachers have asked themselves the same question..haven't they?

Indeed there is an element of the New Age Movement that is completely antithetical to Yiddishkeit. The main thinker who brought this to the forefront over a 100 years ago was a russian woman name Madame Blavatsky.


What are these teachings?

Blavatsky’s Theosophy deals with such hookum as the "seven root races". The god like giant Aryan race lived on Atlantis and lost their god-like status by intermarrying with the “semi-human” Jews. The intermarrying with Jews caused the Aryans to devolve, according to Blavatsky. Blavatsky called Judaism a “religion of hate and malice toward everyone and everything outside itself.” , while the Aryans were the most advanced people spiritually.

It is important not to dismiss these hatreds of klal Yisroel as just the rantings of a few marginal kooks.

http://www.social-ecology.org/lgp/issues/lgp35.html


Ickes is not some ghost in the shadows.

However it is not as if we have not been aware of this. Chazal and Yechezkal cover the emergence of the minim in chevlai Moshiach.

So there is a connection with gafni and new age . It is not a stretch to ID this connection as lo tov. Gafni knew where to go. And go he did.

Just so you all know, the Jewish community in SLC knows that he's here, knows who he is, and is trying to keep tabs.

"Shit! He bears a striking resemblance in this photo to Eagle's bandmate Don Henley (who ironically was once caught doing cocaine with a 15 year old hooker."

A dirtbag is a dirtbag, no matter what his professed hashkafah is. In that spirit, I offer this song: (Apologies to the Eagles):

Take it Gafni

Well, I'm a runnin' from the law, tryin' to get my rocks off,
I've got seven women on my mind:
four that wanna sue me, two that wanna screw me,
one says she is only nine.
Mordy Gafni, Mordy Gafni,
don't let the sound of your conscience
drive you crazy.
Preach the New Age while you still can, even if we can't understand,
just find a new name to make your stand and take it easy.

Well, I'm a standin' with a kipah in Salt Lake City, Utah
and such a bad sight to see:
it's a girl, my Lord, informing Luke Ford
that the Jews should take a look at me.
Come on, baby, you didn't say maybe.
I gotta know if jailbait love is gonna convict me.
I may lose and I may win though I will never have this identity again.
So open up, I want to get in, 'cause I'm so sleazy.

Well, I'm a runnin' from the law, with my character flaws,
got a world of trouble on my mind.
Lookin' for a lover who won't blow my cover,
she's so hard to find.
Mordy Gafni, Mordy Gafni,
don't let the size of your own ego drive you crazy.
Come on, Mordy, don't be horny.
I gotta know if your sweet love is gonna slay thee.
Oh, we gurus got it easy,
we oughta take our groupies easy.

To begin: After reading the Gafni article in the catalyst, then actually spending a few hours looking through the polygraph tests and professional evaluation in the Controversy section of Gafni's website, I find myself sickened by some of the comments on this post and, if fact, the title of the post itself.

Second: Is Vicki Polin REALLY the voice of Judaism in America? Are her claims of Judaic-Satanism and baby eating really the tone that you want to set? Does the fact that Vicki Polin makes a living attacking Jews and spiritual leaders as a means to fund raise and support her sitting at home, surfing the internet instead of actually running an Awareness Center that did something other than make stuff up and attack innocent people, all on the basis of a debunked hypnotism method really embody the Jewish ideal of advocacy in the world?

In the Catalyst article: http://www.catalystmagazine.net/specials/community/trial-by-internet-an-archetypal-spiritual-drama.html the author's state that they spend months going through hundreds of pages of files showing evidence of Gafni's innocence. The article even states that by releasing his evidence to the internet, he'd be dragging the women, as well as their names and identities, into the public debate, making them targets of the same type, if oppositely motivated, of attacks that he's gone through on the internet.

He also talks about moving forward and turning the other cheek, letting bygones be bygones. I find that inspiring.

As a non-Jew reading this story and then seeing the internet attacks continue, as they do in this post and its comments section, I am sickened and disgusted.

Popular and controversial religious leaders always seem to attract these type of attacks and Gafni is behaving with a degree of decorum that I would find impossible to match in the same circumstances.

His refusal to take revenge on the women who did this to him is noble and progressive.

Take the time to look through his website and actually read the documents that Gafni has provided instead of attacking from a position of ignorance and false anger.

There are far too many actual offenders to spend time attacking one who can prove he's been set up. Feminism and crimes against women are serious. This sort of attack, falsely accusing someone like this, weakens the position of women's progress and makes real victims more vulnerable when they try to fight back against abuse.

When Vicki Polin is the inspiration behind your baseless attacks, especially toward a guy who says he's not interested in a wholly justified revenge trip, it is a sad state of affairs.

A No-Spin Perspective on Marc (Mordechai) Gafni?

The reappearance and self-defense of Marc Gafni in Salt Lake City, Utah and on his website, after two years from the controversy and his ouster from Bayit Chadash in Israel presents the spiritual public with the question as how to evaluate the appropriateness of a spiritual teacher. I think if we stick to a minimalist definition of the available facts and exercise a further minimalist definition of wisdom the answer will present itself.

What are the minimally relevant facts available about Marc Gafni?

1. He acknowledges that he has been divorced 3x
2. He acknowledges that at the age of 19 he had a physical relationship with a girl of 14 which is illegal.
3. He has acknowledged recently being involved in sexual relationships with his students and staff and has further acknowledged that this was ultimately harmful, unethical and misguided.
4. His spiritual teachings place a significant emphasis on Eros, Sexuality, Paganism and the Divine Feminine.
5. He has a well developed intellect, is articulate, prolific, accomplished, charismatic, spiritually committed and has spiritually inspired thousands of people.
6. He has been ostracized as a teacher from both the Orthodox community from which he developed to the Jewish Renewal community which in Israel he was a leading member.
7. There are a lot of unanswered questions that will likely remain unanswered with any credible degree of veracity via a court of law secular or rabbinic.
8. There are a sizeable amount of negative rumors as to what transpired sexually over the last 20 some years which will never be proven as fact or fiction.

In keeping to what is undisputed fact I have tried to steer away from what is called perspective or in modern parlance spin. Obviously, the above facts can be spun in a way to see Marc Gafni in the most positive light possible and likewise they can be spun to see him in the worst darkeness. Let us suspend our spin faculty, those of his enemies as well as those of his defenders as we are all not in a position to determine whether either of these spins are in fact true, false or somewhere in between. What are we left with?

I think that with the above fact profile the following assessment can be made without resorting to spin:

1. Marc Gafni has an established inability to maintain a marriage
2. Marc Gafni from a relatively early age has expressed in one incident a disregard for law religious or secular when sexuality was involved.
3. Marc Gafni engaged more recently in unwise, self and other-destructive sexual behavior with persons profesionally close to him.
4. Marc Gafni has expressed a radical shift in regards to his spiritual and sexual path changing from an Orthodox (Married) Rabbi to a Jewish Renewalist (Self- Proclaimed Bohemian.)
5. In the context of the above issues in relation to sexuality and marriage that Marc Gafni’s has demonstrated over his lifetime, emphasis on these sexual, feminine and pagan aspects of spirituality and in areas of Judaism like Kabbalah are of significant concern as they in the wrong minds can easily be misinterpreted and distorted in a way that supports and justifies a person’s neurotic character and self- deceptions.
6. None of the wisdom and spirituality however profound and insightful contained within any of the several books, articles, workshops, retreats, PBS special etc… has prevented Marc Gafni from destroying his life and career if judged by the ability to engage in fulfilling committed familial relationships, having sustained success in a career and be considered an upstanding and psychologically healthy member of societies of which he has chosen to be a part of.


The appropriateness of Marc Gafni as a spiritual teacher will not be fought in the institutions of Orthodox or Jewish Renewal communities where he is a matter of fact a pariah but rather in the hearts and minds of individuals and smaller teaching environments where his background is either not known or is presented with his portrayal of events taken as fact. The above communities and many individuals when taking a look at such a profile let alone what is out there rightfully or wrongfully on the internet and given that the most recent episode was only two years ago would generally be cautious.

However there is a legitimate question which is that, “Given, that we understand that we are dealing with a highly complicated and seriously flawed individual and we are aware of how his issues have expressed themselves, is it still not possible to learn from him and just be mindful of what we need to be mindful of?” On the surface, the answer to that question is yes, in particular the more developed and knowledgeable one is. There is as well a Talmudic precedent for that as well in Rabbi Meir’s attempted discipleship from Elisha Ben Abuyah where he.” Ate the fruit and discarded the shell”.

However, given that this would involve both a correct and a fairly high estimation of one’s own spiritual and intellectual development and knowledge and as well a precise evaluation of the exact arenas and magnitude of Marc Gafni’s distortions perhaps it would be wise to be more conservative and take a lesson from a quality that Marc Gafni has yet to embody or teach which is caution and care for one’s self.

I would also add that the whole premise that one can separate who a teacher is as a personality and character from their teaching on higher levels of spirituality is completely false as the entire function of spiritual teaching is the transformation of self. This unless you believe that you can be at once enlightened and yet self- destructive in the extreme and hurtful of others. Personally I have no ability or desire to fathom this.

It is lastly necessary to point out that Marc Gafni is far from unique in his issues and that whether it be within the Orthodox Rabbinate, The Jewish Renewal Rabbinate and the Eastern paths there are all too many examples of Rabbis and Gurus with fallen personalities with at times elevated and wise souls and the stories all sound more or less similar to what we are hearing with Marc Gafni.

One of the unfortunate aspects of this genre of a teacher is that there is a tragic combination of a teacher’s perception of needing to make a living through his teaching, the teachers neurosis being wrapped up in his teaching, the perception that his teaching fills a great need and often the inspired and empathic students who encourage him on and often rally to enable him or in their view support him. I have never heard one happy ending to such a set and setting when the teacher had such a background as that of Marc Gafni and he resurfaced after two years of his most recent expression of self- destruction. For in my book each of the failed marriages is at least to an extent a reflection of his flawed and failed personality as well. If he resurfaced after 10 years maybe, this with a rock sold marriage, reconciliation with those who have been hurt, strict teaching boundaries that take into account past errors and a thorough psychological evaluation backed up with 5-7 years of therapy or the equivalent.

We however live in a free world and March Gafni does not have to answer to any spiritual authority especially in Utah or in the Blogosphere and thus he is free to pursue his teaching and make what he can of his life as a teacher without submitting to the boundaries, perspective and the wisdom of the communities he has been a part of for the last 47 years he simply can find other self selected communities which is what he appears to be doing.

I want to conclude by wishing Mordechai Gafni a complete physical and psychological healing and a life of blessing, sincere repentance, transformation and courage. May he merit to be refined in such a way that his teaching as well as his being are truly: responsible, wise, pure, holy, true and filled with authentic and mature love.


I believe in the power and force of prayer. If these are lies, I pray he is cleared. If these are true, I pray the God of Truth exact his justice upon this deceiver.

I don't understand why people have such a problem with consensual relationships. I think this world needs more love, not less. It's clear that some of the relationships he's entered into have been regrettable, for himself or for the person he was involved with, but isn't that true of everyone? I'm glad that someone is exploring this territory, daring to find out how the love of God and the love between humans can coexist in deeper forms. Of course there are going to be missteps, but that's the point of consensual relationship - we all enter in with a willingness to risk, and we all take responsiblity for our own path.

Um, "Steve Anderson," did Gafni coerce you into writing that ridiculously naive comment? Do you have any idea of the extent of trauma and destruction this con man has caused over the years?
Of course he is working overtime to convince his gullible supporters that the only thing he's guilty of is "consensual relationships" gone sour. Nothing could be further than the truth.
Just look at the facts (as enumerated in the posts above), look at his long scandal-ridden history, and look at the fact that everyone who REALLY knows him -- i.e., the entire Jewish and Israeli world -- has, quite correctly, shunned him for life. They wouldn't do that if the problem had to do with "consensual relationships"...so wake up, Steve. You've been conned.

AN UPDATED TREATISE ON THE NEED FOR A SEMITIC MODERN MASTURBATION MENTALITY

By Rabbi Moshe “hung so lo“ Rabeynu, Ph.d April 19, 2009
comments

CHILDREN AND ADOLESCENTS MUST BE INCULCATED AS TO THE BENEFITS OF MASTURBATION IN THE ATTAINMENT AND MAINTENANCE OF A HEALTHY MIND AND A HEALTHY BODY! PENT UP SEXUAL FRUSTRATION IN CHILDREN HAS NEVER BEEN HONESTLY AND ADEQUATELY DISCUSSED AND DEALT WITH IN JEWISH DISCOURSE AND DOCTRINE. HISTORICALLY, JEWISH PARENTS HAVE BEEN ABLE TO COPE WITH THEIR MASTURBATING CHILDREN BY ASSERTIONS THAT GOD IS OFFENDED BY THEIR ENGAGING IN THIS ACTIVITY AND THAT HE VEHEMENTLY FORBIDS THEM THE RESULTANT RELIEF AND COMFORT. HOW MANY CHILDREN ARE STARTED ON THE ROAD TO ATHEISM OR APOSTASY DUE TO THEIR PARENTS’ GROSS OVER-REACTION TO THEIR HARMLESS CHILDHOOD WANKERY? THE SCENARIO OF JEWISH PARENTS MOANING AND GROANING AND HARANGUING THEIR FRIGHTENED CHILDREN WITH THREATS OF GOD’S WRATH FOR MASTURBATING IS COMICAL AND TRAGIC AT THE SAME TIME. THEY MIGHT AS WELL TELL THEIR CHILDREN THAT GOD DOES NOT CONDONE THEIR SCRATCHING THEIR LITTLE ASSES IF THEY HAVE AN ITCH.
MODERN LIFESTYLES AFFORD INDIVIDUALS THE PRIVACY AND HYGIENIC FACILITIES NECESSARY TO MASTURBATE IN A PRIVATE, DIGNIFIED AND SANITARY MANNER. ONE CAN WELL UNDERSTAND THE IRE THAT WAS AROUSED BY MASTURBATING INDIVIDUALS FOUR THOUSAND YEARS AGO WHEN AN ENTIRE LARGE FAMILY LIVED TOGETHER IN A TENT IN AN ARID LOCATION. NOBODY WANTED TO HAVE A WAD OF FLYING JISSUM HIT HIM IN THE EYE OR LAND IN HIS HUMUS. WATER WAS SCARCE AND ONE HAD TO WALK , SOMETIMES LONG DISTANCES, TO THE WELL TO GET IT, IF IT WAS AVAILABLE AT ALL. UNDER THESE CIRCUMSTANCES IT WAS A CHOICE OF WATER FOR DRINKING OR WATER FOR WASHING EJACULATE OFF OF ONE’S HANDS. THIS IS WHY THE EARLY SAGES WERE SO VOCIFEROUS IN THEIR CONDEMNATION OF MASTURBATION. WE JEWISH PEOPLE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A HORNY BUNCH AND, IF THERE WEREN'T THESE SEVERE STRICTURES AGAINST MASTURBATION AT THAT TIME, THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN ERRANT CUMSTAINS ALL OVER THE PLACE AND THE SMELL OF FRESHLY RELEASED JISSUM WOULD HAVE WAFTED FAR AND WIDE, EVEN WITHIN THE HALLOWED HALLWAYS OF THE SACRED TEMPLE ITSELF.
TIMES HAVE CHANGED. IF PARENTS TODAY STRESS THE BENEFITS OF MASTURBATION TO THEIR CHILDREN, THEY WILL HELP LESSEN THE OCCURRENCE OF STDs, AND UNPLANNED PREGNANCIES. SCHOLARSHIP LEVELS WOULD INCREASE DRAMATICALLY WITH THE RELEASE OF PENT UP ADOLESCENT EJACULATORY TENSION. .WHAT PARENT HASN’T FRETTED AND WORRIED OVER THE MOODINESS AND SURLINESS OF HIS ADOLESCENT OFFSPRING? THERE IS REALLY NO MYSTERY AS TO WHY THE LITTLE BASTARDS ARE ACTING OUT SO WILDLY. THEIR HORMONES ARE CAUSING THEM HIGH LEVELS OF DISCOMFORT AND FRUSTRATION. INSTEAD OF MAKING THEM MASTURBATE FURTIVELY UNDER THE BEDCOVERS IN A NIGHTLY GUILT- RIDDEN FRENZY OF PENT-UP SEXUAL DESIRE, THEY SHOULD BE GUIDED TO A CIVILIZED AND GUILT-FREE MASTURBATORY REGIMEN. IF NECESSARY, PARENTS SHOULD SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THEIR CHILDREN AS TO THE PROPER METHODOLOGY FOR THIS ACTIVITY AND FOLLOW UP AND MAKE SURE THAT THEIR CHILDREN ARE MASTURBATING REGULARLY AT AN OPTIMUM FREQUENCY. KEEPING A MASTURBATION DIARY COULD BE A VERY USEFUL TOOL IN MAINTAINING THE PROPER SCHEDULE. EVERY PARENT SHOULD ASK HIS CHILDREN ON A DAILY BASIS, "DID YOU DO YOUR HOMEWORK AND MASTURBATE TODAY?"
OH, OF COURSE, THE CHABADNIKS AND THE FRUMNIKS AND THE HAREDINIKS WILL YELL OUT, "BUT RAMBAM SAID THIS, AND RASHI SAID THAT AND RABBI AKIVA SAID THIS, AND THAT, ABOUT THE EVILS OF MASTURBATION." PROBABLY ALL THREE OF THEM WERE MASTURBATING WHILE THEY WERE WRITING THESE STRICTURES, ANOTHER CASE OF "DO AS I SAY, NOT AS I DO". WE MUST NOT CONTINUE TO LET OTHERS DO OUR THINKING FOR US UNDER THE GUISE OF DIVINE REVELATION AND RELIGIOUS EXPERTISE. WE CANNOT LET BACKWARD LOOKING ZEALOTS WITH THEIR ARCHAIC, OUTDATED AND ANACHRONISTIC MORALISTIC MISCONCEPTIONS CAST THEIR PALL OVER THE HEALTH-CONSCIOUS MASTURBATORS OF THE WORLD. WHAT WAS LOOKED UPON AS A SHONDER FOUR THOUSAND YEARS AGO BY UNENLIGHTENED MENTALITIES SHOULD NOT BE SO DENIGRATED IN THESE MODERN TIMES. THE BLESSINGS OF MASTURBATORY RELIEF SHOULD BE LOOKED UPON AS THE BIRTHRIGHT OF ALL B’NEI ADAM. SHALOM AND ZEI GEZUNT!

Rabbi Rabeynu is available for additional advice and discussion on HTTP://theyeshivabucher.blogspot.com

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